sorry, that was bad, even by my low, low standards
born michael micklewhite at some point in the 20th century, michael grew up (gasp!). prefering not to sound like some dickens character (and who can blame him?!) michael decided to change his surname. for one reason, he could now create that famous rhyming couplet - my name is michael caine! and for another thing, michael caine was much 'arder than michael micklewhite, surely.
so, after his successful name change, caine went on to appear in over 97006337217947342 movies, his most acclaimed being his role in "muppet christmas carol," i'm sure. one of his first of which was Zulu, the fact-based movie in which british troops outnumbered 40-1 overcome overwhelming odds at rorke's drift in 1879. other films include "the italian job," which sees caine and his lads doing a, errrr, job in, um, italy, with loadsa lovely minis. then there's "alfie" which sees caine playing the loveable but insensitive womaniser called, err, alfie. next comes "educating rita" in which caine tries to, oh dear, educate a woman called rita. then there's "hannah and her sisters" featuring the neurotic woody allen - 'nuff said. er, "escape to victory" sees caine and his boys trying to make light of their incarceration in a nazi prisoner of war camp by challenging german officers to a footie match, thus setting the scene for ensuing england germany matches. by the way pele and a few lads from the england '66 team join in - again, 'nuff said. lastly there's "the man who would be king," the exceedingly good kipling adaptation, with sean connery alongside michael caine - so, on your knees and get worshipping.
humblest apologies go out to those who have yet to see these films and now feel like every plot has been given away!
1. "you're only supposed to blow the bladdy doors off" - "the italian job"
2. "my name is michael caine" - never actually featured in a film (obviously) though probably taken from "my name is alfie," the first line in "alfie"
3. "don't throw those bladdy spears at me" - "zulu" - honest!
4. "hold on lads, i've got an idea" - "the italian job"
5. "not a lot of people know that" - i suppose this is from "educating rita" though that's not the actual line. the real dialogue is: "not *many* people know that," but then that's coming from an anorak!
*er, i'm sure you may have guessed it's not
i've got a really great idea, let's go to the main page