i've been to every virgin festival since v98 - jeez, it's soooo difficult to break with tradition! so i dunno if this qualifies me to show you the vaguest of survival guides. a lot of people reckon that the v fests aren't proper festivals. hmmmmm... well, they have bands, fairs, campsites, dodgy toilet facilities and umm, they're in a big field in the middle of nowhere. so, if they aren't proper festivals, then what are they smart arse? :P
1. don't camp! for those tens of thousands of people who camp - are you insane?! you insist on camping, but all you do is complain about it!
face it, even the grottiest of guest houses supercede the filth of camping. you don't have to freeze to death in the night (which is always helpful), you have a luxurious flush-toilet that doesn't wobble when you step inside, and you don't get ants crawling over you in the morning. besides, i found waiting for a taxi in the centre of leeds at 2am much more fun than searching for my tent and tripping over guy ropes in the dark.
2. take tissues - for obvious reasons. but you can also show your disapproval of a crap by throwing it at them. but ssshhhh, that can be our secret ;)
3. don't be forced to use the cash machine - there's normally at least 2 hour queue and a £2 charge for the privilege of missing your fave bands in the process.
4. if you buy merchandise, such as a t-shirt, for god's sake put it on straight away. doing so will save it creasing (god, i'm such a female) or getting stolen.
5. take some bin bags so that you can sit down and chill during the "crappy hour."
6. stay away from the noodle bars. ever wondered why there's always a carpet of noodles on the floor? well, putting this subtly, they taste like plague.
7. cookies and coffee are a must!
8. the pizza's usually nice too!
9. never walk in a straight line - it's the law.
10. look as aimless as possible.
11. mobile phones are damn useful. jo whiley once complained of the amount of people using mobile phones at festivals, saying that technology should be put aside in order to enjoy the music! 1) she said this in front of a tv set!!! 2) well, she's not gonna get lost, she's followed by her crew all day!
12. sod fashion. you don't wanna ruin your best clothes do you?
13. don't camp! got it?!
"i lost my friends, i danced alone, it's six o'clock, i wanna go home"